“Building” the Proposal
By, Tabitha Miki Floral Designer for Jolene Kaneshige Photography
Aloha! If you have been following my blogs, you know what a car enthusiast I am! As much as I love my sparkles and flowers, I love listening to my guy friends and my boyfriend “geek” out over cars!! It is such a great learning experience! So in their honor, I decided that today’s blog would be dedicated to those car enthusiasts! What does a car have to do with surprise, Hawaiian destination proposals? A lot more than you can imagine! I was inspired by my all time favorite and my dream muscle car, the Hellcat Challenger and that sporty speed demon, the corvette; it got me thinking of all the different parts of the car and how it functions. I saw that just like building a car, that special partner needs to “build” a proposal! Wow! Eureka! So I decided it would be helpful to “breakdown” the most basic elements of the proposal and show a basic model;showing that everything else beyond the basic elements would be like adding “upgrades”, or “kits” to the proposal!
Part 1: The Body- The body of the car is like the venue of the proposal. Where you decide to propose will dictate the type of setting, and/ or look, and the mood of your proposal! Just like a red chevrolet camaro will convey a different look than a silver Prius; a proposal in front of a beach estate will be different from a proposal from the outside of your partner’s family’s home! Each venue will also require different checklists of things that need to be brought because of the conditions of the venue. For example, If you are planning a beach proposal, you may need an umbrella, sunscreen, beach blanket, just to name a few. Where a romantic chartered boat ride would be needing other things, anti-nausea gum, or medicine that prevents sea sickness that does not cause drowsiness would be a good thing to carry. Another important thing about public venues is if you plan to do some elaborate set up, they may require permits, so it is important to research that with your city & county parks and recreation department. Some states may also have fees and require head notice.
Part 2: The Engine- The engine of a car is like the plan for carrying out the proposal. The engine is an essential part of the car; in order for the car to be able to start, it needs an engine. A proposal needs a plan in order to be executed. Where will the proposal take place? When? What time of day? What type of weather conditions will be facing at the venue? How far in advance do I need to make reservations? Are there permits required, if it is a public venue? Maybe a prewritten speech to help calm nerves, so you know what to say. What type of decorations? Will I hire a photographer or a professional to help with the planning and execution of the proposal? What is my budget if I do hire someone? If I do it myself, who will help with set up and clean up? These are just a few of the basic questions that you need to be able to answer when you plan your proposal.
Part 3: The Wheels- The wheels allow the car to move from point A to point B.In the same manner, your “speech” of your partner’s virtues and what you say to ask ,“Will you Marry Me” is how the Proposal moves along! So whether it is a romantic poem, sonnet, song your write, or simply “Will You Marry Me”, it is a very important piece of the proposal! Remember to take your time, breathe, and not rush. This moment is the moment you and your partner will remember for a lifetime. It is not only for your partner, it is also for you! Enjoy this moment together! Another rule of thumb is: if you hire a photographer to capture the moment, remember to keep it a secret for as long as possible. Don’t rush your partner through it after they have accepted. The photographer will make themselves available to you at the right time. It’s easy to forget and want to take advantage of all the time you have with the photographer, but they are willing to work with you and they know what they are doing. The purpose is to allow you and your partner to revel in the moment and enjoy it!
Part 4: The Transmission- This piece of equipment, though small in size compared to the rest of the car is an integral part to the entire vehicle! The ring, this small piece of the puzzle, is the physical symbol and proof of your commitment to your lifelong journey together and that important piece of equipment that you will want to be able to give your partner when you propose. (I know your partner may say it’s alright if you don’t propose with a ring, or they may say it’s ok to give them a cubic zirconia aka diamond simulant; but it’s not ideal to propose that way. If the ring is a symbol of your commitment, would you want the key gemstone to be fake? Is that the message you want to convey to the person you profess to love, honor, and cherish? This is a milestone in both your lives and should be approached with care and forethought, therefore, the ring should be something reflective of that. It is the symbol that your partner will look at when you hit those tough times in your relationship, so make it something they will be proud to wear! With that said, it doesn’t need to put you in debt either. In fact, it’s more key to approach this with a level head and sound financial advice).
Before you go in and buy that important piece of the puzzle, do your homework. Talk to a financial planner and get your finances in check if they are not already, well before you propose. At that same time that you are considering that special piece of proposal equipment, talk to jewelers, to see what the price range is and know what you can afford, what to look for in a ring as well. A jeweler can be your best friend! Remember, this is an investment just as much as the relationship is an investment! Therefore, the ring doesn’t have to be that huge diamond if you can’t afford it. It is better to understand what you can and can’t afford and financing options ahead of time, especially if you plan to go together at a later time to pick the ring.(It saves a lot of time and embarrassment later). If you need that showstopper ring, your jeweler will be able to suggest options that will make it budget friendly. If you don’t plan to go together, your jeweler may be able to suggest options to ensure 1). You propose with a ring at the very least and 2). your partner gets the ring that they have always dreamed of without putting you in debt up to your ears!
Part 5: The interior of the car – The interior of the car evokes a certain type of look. It matters if the interior is leather or not, the color of the interior, it all speaks to the overall design of a car. The interior of the car is like all the details of the proposals like the type of food, if it’s at a restaurant, the linen, the other accessories,flowers, etc. These details, although they seem minor are actually what your partner will hone in on and remember. These “little things” are the details they pass on ALL their friends, coworkers, family, and your future children. It is truly these little details that make all the difference! However, you can make it special without having it have to be expensive. The key is : (if you don’t do it already) start listening to your partner and start paying attention to all the little details about them. When you go to a restaurant, pay attention to the things they order. If you are out with them, pay attention to colors they tend to wear or the colors of their accessories. It is a big clue to their color preferences without having to blatantly ask them. (Although, there is nothing wrong with asking them that either. Just don’t do it right before the proposal, it’s kind of a big hint you are getting them something). You will learn a lot faster what their likes and dislikes are by paying attention to the little things about your partner and will be able to choose things to enhance the proposal to make it memorable and enjoyable for the both of you.
Part 6: The Body Kit/ The Add-ons- These are like the upgrades or other lavish details that you can add to a proposal like writing, “Will You Marry Me” in the sand with rose petals, a private serenade, a fancy car to drive you and your loved one to the venue, etc. However,with these add-ons, the sky’s the limit! Pretty much almost anything you can dream can be incorporated to that special moment! (Budget willing of course.)
I hope this was helpful and enjoyable for everyone, and that I was able to show you that building your proposal is not so intimidating! Still need help? Please feel free to contact us at Jolene Kaneshige Photography and we would be honored to help you “build” your proposal!